A Part of Me

So....even though I am still in love with him.

I think I always will be.

I hope he moved on. I hope he is happy.

Not to ever worry about me.

I am slowly moving on.

I may never find a love as intense and overwhelming like him. Nor do I want to. He is my first love. Always will be. And yes, I wish at times he would come back and sweep me off my feet again...but at the same time I want him happy. I don't make him happy. I just complicate his life.

And as much as I want to hold on to him forever, that isn't moving forward. That is staying in the past.

So these past few months, I been reconnecting with my old best friend from high school. A guy. And little by little he is making me feel like I can possibly like someone else beside my first love.

I cried a bit at that thought.

I wanted to be his last love so badly. Get married and become his wife.

But as everyone said. I am not good enough, or compatitable with him.

I will always love him.

I don't know if I will love anyone as much as I did with him. But... I suppose I should at least try to move on. Be selfish and once again shine like the sun.