So yeah. I left this stupid blog on a positive note. But life just loves to keep hitting me and honestly it is just starting to get to me.
Matt and I were doing so well, but then now....idk what is happening. -sighs-
School keeps getting more and more tiring and I am just...tired.
This was suppose to be my year. MY YEAR! I DESERVE A YEAR WHERE I AM ACTUALLY HAPPY FOR ONCE.
In less than 2 weeks into this new year, I been in a bad accident and injured myself badly.
Matt and I been having problems. My grades slipped a bit and now I am strugglig to get things done.
Family has been having problems left and right. My older sister has been helpful but she has been venting to me about her life nd then everyone at school expects me to be this amazing person where I feel like I am failing them cause I am not living up to their expectations. And..and...i just don't know.
My aunt accidently threw out my favorite stuffed animals which brought me comfort when I feel down. So now I am just...Idk...just wish I had someone to talk to. I feel like if I opened up to someone they will just tell me what I already know and this Matt thing....idk, if this falls apart not only did I lose him as a bf but as my best friend. I already lost Ashe and if i lost Matt....I told him I didn' want to jump. I told him I am terrified of relationships. I told him I am easily scsred and easily to worry about where I stand in someone's life.
....I just...
Why can't things ever go smoothly for me. I can't even cry because I am never alone to do so, and if i cry around someone then they'd expect me to tell them what is wrong and. Idk I can't explain it. But I just know this yeat is going to be one of the worst years I have. I just know it.
