Once again...

I haven't posted in a while. I just been, distracted greatly.

I started working once again, and I have been very tired. Though it's not all bad, I would pass the time talking to someone amazing, though he doesn't know it.

Anyways, it's that time of year again in the USA. Thanksgiving is just around the corner. Sadly I won't be spending it with my family, in fact I'm going to be spending it alone in a big building by myself. My family though will be attending a get together full of fun people. I am going to miss the dancing competition. It's a group dance, where you join in with a group. A few of the girls and I were working on a routine, but I suppose it's for the best since my knee is still acting up from time to time.

Is it saddening that I'll be alone on Thanksgiving? No, I don't think so. I wouldn't know, I just have to look at it as another day passing by. Though I will also be alone on Christmas and on New Years. -weak laugh- I guess that means I'll be spending my year alone, and to myself. 

I have been doing a lot of thinking and opening up lately to one person. Things I wouldn't really say to people, even the ones I consider my bestest of best friends. The things one rather keep hidden. To feel that exposed to someone is very scary for me.I just hope he knows that I trust him. 

I cried earlier this evening. Something I haven't done in over a year. I was listening to music, and then my tears started to fall. Did I mean to cry? Did I want to? No. I didn't. I don't like crying. But I am a cry baby. I cry over everything, but I always come out with a smile. 

Most people usually say hat they are mostly Thankful for, I guess in light of the season I shall list 22 things I am thankful for. (The date of today) I'll do so until Thanksgiving, meaning I shall be writing more~

Things I'm thankful for:

1. Being alive - Yes I am very thankful for that, I like being alive.

2. My family - They aren't always the perfect family, but they are the best for me. They put up with my quirks and still love me for me.

3. My healthy - Health in my family isn't that great, most of my family has many health problems, I am lucky enough to have none as of yet, and hoping I won't later on.

4. My ability to smile - No matter what happens in life, the good, the bad, the fact I can smile means I will be okay.

5. The internet - No, not because of a pass time, but because it has allowed me to meet amazing people that if the internet wasn't around I would have never known.

6. My voice - The ability to talk is something important to me. Because I am scared of speaking my mind, the option of being able to is very comforting.

7. My best friends - No matter what I do they're always there. They allow me to cry my eyes out to them, allow me to be a baby when I can no longer hold on, and they'll bring me back to reality with a smile.

8. My heart - Without it I wouldn't be alive.

9. Emotions - Yes, sometimes people claim they wish they didn't have any; I can't imagine life without all the emotions. They make us human, make us feel and know what we want.

10. Being able to forgive - Forgiveness is something most people are unable to do. I am happy to know I am able to forgive. 

11. Ashe - Though he may not know it, he is a person I can talk to easily, someone who isn't just a dear friend, but someone who is so close to my heart it suffocates me.

12. My mom - She is my solid rock in my life. She helps me stand tall and basically in the end, she's my truest best friend.

13. Art - Art is something I love. 

14. Music - Allows me to feel and be able to connect to when there is no one to talk to.

15. Gaia online - (laughs) Yes, a website. Without this site I think I'd be bored to tears, and this site also brought such an amazing person in my life.

16. Sight - Even though I wear glasses, at least I can still see.

17. This blog - Allows me to express what is on my mind through writing.

18. My past teachers - I still keep in touch with some. The ones who made such a big difference in my life.

19. Abdon - I don't talk to him anymore, but he was my best friend in Middle School. And he has helped me in the biggest way possible. He helped me when I was down in high school, despite he and I fought a lot.

20. Theater - I just adore theater.

21. People who show kindness to others - Whenever I see someone put a smile on someone else's face by doing the smallest thing, it warms my heart.

22. Dreams - Thankful for dreams, it gives me something to hope and wish for.

That's all for now. Until next time, Ciao~