Pressure...stress.

I might be going on a slight rant, but I'm glad not many people actually read this. -huffy laugh-

Why do people always expect so much of me? So what if I don't live up to how they see me being. I'm tired of having to please people. I am tired of it. Always having to smile and nod along. Who are they to tell me what to say, what to do? 

People wonder why I just run away. Why I turn back to those who understand me, who actually deals with me. 

My friend Sondra is the perfect example for someone I can always turn to. 

I've talked to her about anything. She never judges, never turns away because she doesn't like what I say. She accepts my decision. Does she think it's the right one? Most likely not. But does she know how I feel, yes. She understands, I'm still young. I love what, who, I love. I can't help it. 

But why should others, have to put me down for my choices? Have I ever judged someone? No. Have I always supported their decisions even if I didn't think it was right? Yes, of course I voiced my opinion, but I always support what my friends want to do. 

Why can't people do that for me? Am I that horrible of a person? Have I done people wrong? I understand if I've purposely went out of my way to screw you over. But I never try to hurt people. I always love making people smile. But when it's something I truly want to do, or feel I have to do, why does it always bite me back? Hm, maybe I'm truly a horrible person and I didn't even know it. -sighs- 

I am at the point where I should just say "fuck it, I'm going to be a bitch to everyone." But that's not like me at all. I can't help but be nice and kind to people. 

Why can't people just be that way to me?

Well until next time, Ciao~